FYI: It’s a brain not a bum.
I’m mixing things up this week. I’ve read a book not a journal. I know, I know, how old-fashioned. It’s called ‘do what you are’ by Tieger & Barron and is supposedly the key to finding your dream job… You have to find out your personality type and this should tell you which career will allow you to flourish. Simple, right? Makes you wonder why so many people are unemployed (someone should really tell them, all they need to do is read a goddamn book).
So here’s the deal. This week, we’ll work out what personality type you are (there are 16) and then in subsequent weeks, I’ll go through each personality type and essentially become the world’s greatest careers advisor.
Why bother working anyway?
Now it is very tempting to just say a big fuck you to society and become at one with the world. You need those precious hours to be creative, to come up with that life changing idea, to answer the unsolved philosophical questions or to sit in your pants and play xbox. However, for those who decide to conform (urgh!) most people will work over 90,000 hours in their lifetime. Not to bring a downer on the whole affair or anthing… And, apparently 80% of people are dissatisfied with their job. So let’s just spend half our lives doing something we hate. Perfect.
Let’s jump into your brain. Mushy.
Tieger & Barron use the ever-famous Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) to determine personality type. So let’s dive right in, rummage about, pick your brain apart and see who you really are. You’ll need to pick which one sounds more like you from each of the four pairs, so you’ll end up with four letters at the end (sorry that it involves you doing something, it’s minimal I swear):
Extraversion (E) – Introversion (I)
Extroverts are basically those annoying people who don’t shut up and have to talk to everyone and anyone they see, they crave attention and feed off other people’s energy, kind of like a more sociable Dracula. Introverts are those withdrawn creepy types, who seem to always look hunched up in a corner (how they always manage to travel anywhere but always be in a corner is beyond me), they are creatures of thought, psychotic, some might say.
Extroverts want breadth, they want it all and they want it now. Their ideas are developed by talking or doing things, by getting involved. Think of those team building activities that are supposed to assist in bonding (bonding always makes me picture two people glued together; sinister), if it fills you with dread you’ll probably an introvert… vice versa, hello extrovert. In contrast, introverts want depth. They want to think before they blurt something stupid out, they want to learn about something it its entirety, and they are just a little bit less keen.
So are you an ‘E’ or an ‘I’? Write it down and move on!
Sensing (S) – Intuition (N)
Sensors are a rainman type, they remember the details, that Uncle Mike had really bad breadth on Christmas of 2009, there were 102 dirty plates leftover and Granddad gave the worst gift (a hideous duck ornament…). They will always read the manual before assembling anything. No chance, of a wonky table from a sensor, oh no. Bloody annoying if you are an intuitive, you just want to grab the pieces and shove ‘em together; if it goes wrong (highly likely) they can always re-do it.
Intuitives trust their gut instincts (risky eh?) they believe in hunches and imagination, all the things THAT AREN’T REAL. They look into the future and want to see the bigger picture, kind of like one of those con-artist gypsy fortune tellers. They won’t be content where they are for long, they agitate for change, like a fidgeting child.
So if you are child-like wrinkly faced gypsy woman/man who can’t sit still you’re an intuitive so write down an ‘N’, if you are a mental freak who does everything by the book, you need to write down ‘S’.
Thinking (T) – Feeling (F)
Thinkers think. Feelers feel. Not exactly rocket science… Thinkers make decisions based on facts and are rational, logical, analytical and cold. Feelers make their decisions based on what they feel is right or how much they care; they are compassionate, empathetic and nosey.
This one’s got a lot to do with emotion. If the overemotional feeler and the unattached thinker clash, it usually ends up with the feeler getting all upset and the thinker wondering what the fuck went wrong (And no, not all (two thirds) men are thinkers and not all (two thirds) women are feelers).
So are you a cold hearted bitch? Or an emotionally unattached robot? Go for T. Or are you a dramatic touchy feely lovey dovey fluffy lady? Or a teary eyed in touch with your feminine side modern man? Go for F.
Judging (J) – Perceiving (P)
Judgers (the name is very harsh, like they hate everyone) are very structured people, they like things just so, in the correct order. OCD? Not quite, but they like to follow steps, guidelines and make lifetime plans. So if you’ve mapped out your 50 year career plan (woop woop!), stick to deadlines without fail and need to be ‘settled’ then you’re a J. Now this sounds mega boring. However, at least you’ve got a plan…
Perceivers are spontaneous and slapdash in their approach. Oh, I might need that just put it over there (to be forgotten about for 6 months) in that sky high pile of crap. They like to not been tied down, love the open road and like to keep options open. So if we want to give it a metaphor, judgers are the dearly loyal husband of 20 years and perceivers are the wild child open relationship kind of guy (hussies).
One great line from the book is ‘Judgers experience tension until closure is reached… Perceivers experience tension when they have to make a decision, they avoid closure’. Closure, that word we are all oh so fond of…
So J or T? Do you want closure? Because we are at the end.
All over! If you’ve got more than four letters then you’ve done it wrong you idiot. For those of you who have managed to do it right. Now you’ve got your type. But you’ll have to wait until text time to see what it means. However, if you are impatient (I am) you can read up about it here… or I’ve given you a little nickname below to give you a little hint. Cheeky.
ENFJ – The emotional souls.
INFJ – The stubborn ideas people.
ENFP – The scatterbrains.
INFP – The mystery man.
ENTJ – The eager beaver.
INTJ – High standards.
ENTP – Commitment issues.
INTP – The problem solver.
ESTJ – The dictator.
ISTJ – Cold.
ESFJ – The pushover.
ESTP – The good time girl.
ISTP – Mister. Indecisive.
ESFP – The social butterfly.
ISFP – Miss. Gullible
ISFJ – Humble pie.